17 November 2011

Love Don't Run

I have heard this song many times on the radio but last night I was able to hear it live at the concert I went to with our 7 year old son. (His first concert ever! Besides Rascal Flats and Brooks and Dunn when I was 7 months preggers with him) :) We enjoyed it quiet a bit and he enjoyed running to the front dancing and taking pictures. Might have a little concert goer with me yet. :) (other than the fact that an hour after bed time it was time to go for both of us).

Back to the song, when he sang this it brought back a few good and not so good memories. Music tends to do that, I'm sure that's a fact for most of us. However, the memory that replays most in my mind is with my husband, I'm glad that he stuck with me when we were dating and I was going through some rough patches of complete and utter independence/not wanting much to do with him as I feared it not working and my son and I being left in the rear view mirror again. While my fears were rational my lack of trust was not, as he was nothing like the ones that brought on my trust issues, yet that trust took longer to gain.... And everyday he continued to hold on and prove that he would never let go. This is what I am most thankful for when it comes to our relationship and, now, marriage. <3


This is gonna hurt, this is gonna hurt like hell
This is gonna damn near kill me, sometimes the truth ain't easy
I know that you’re scared of telling me something
I don’t wanna hear, but baby believe that
I’m not leaving, you couldn’t give me one good reason

Love don’t run, love don’t hide
It won't turn away or back down from a fight
Baby I’m right here and I ain't going anywhere
Love’s too tough it wont give up no not on us
Baby Love don’t run

Let’s lay it on the line, I don’t care if it takes all night cause
This is gonna make us stronger, it’s gonna make forever longer
I know it’d be easier walking away but what we got is real
And I wanna save us, baby we can do it, Baby we’ll get through it 'cause...

Love don’t run, love don’t hide
It won't turn away or back down from a fight
Baby I’m right here and I ain't going anywhere
Love’s too tough, it wont give up no not on us
Baby Love don’t run
Baby love don’t run

So come over here and lay down in my arms
Baby tell me everything that’s on your heart, 'cause...

I won’t run, and I won’t hide
I won’t turn away, I just wanna make things right
Baby I’m right here and I ain't going anywhere
Love’s too tough it won’t give up no not on us
Baby Love don’t run
Baby Love don’t run

01 November 2011


(This says it all perfectly)

It seems that shortly after he left parts of the house has said to hell with me, the cars, the dogs, and at points the man-child. Yesterday was the last straw and I broke down into tears. It doesn't help being pregnant, emotional, sick, stressed, and just downright tired. My motto with him and dealing with literally everything has been "I got this". Yesterday, I had it but felt like it was always something coming up each and every darn week. Ok while looking back it really wasn't thaaaaaaaat big of a deal but so many things boiled up that I broke. Here is just yesterday alone: Woke up with more tissue on the floor than I had recalled using the night before, hard night of little sleep, but got up early and baked the pumpkin pie. Got Jake and myself ready. rushed out the door "almost" forgetting the pie, rushed back in and got it, dropped our boy off at school, and while going to work had the engine light come on (no biggie, needs oil change and tune up) followed by the tire light (damn......) (Mind you this happened last week in my truck and turned out to be a punctured tire). Well no time to deal with it, rush into work. Go check the tires, they all seem good, (maybe it was just the dramatic change in weather over the weekend). Drive to my buddy's work to get my comp from him, drive back to work, park, annnnnnnd...... The damn key won’t come out of the ignition. Push, pull, make sure it's in park, nothing. FFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!! Go upstairs to my office explain the situation and take it to the hobby shop on base. One of the guys that I have worked with before with our work vehicles comes out and fixes it in minutes. (Instert more tears) Turns out the hubby's unknown strength and breaking part of his center console became wedged and wasn't allowing it to hit the sensor in park to release the keys. UGGG! Thank the mechanic and go to leave. Use all my strength to basically break it more to get the shifter to move and drive straight home. Slam it in park, lock the doors and grab my truck. D-U-N with the Jeep. Go back to work, get off work and pick up Jake. Go home to an awfully warm house..... WTF?!?! I left the oven ON all day!!!! Thank the Good Lord nothing bad happened! Scold myself for being so darn forgetful, make Jake a quick dinner, get him dressed and ready and then off we go with his buddy and mommy and baby brother to go Trick or Treating. That was actually calming. :) Home, Jake counted his candy, shower and scooted him off to bed. Watched my TiVo'd Homeland and then off to bed with myself. Yea, about summed it up. Good part during the day was the hubby called and I got to tell him how his Jeep is going off a cliff and we are getting him a new vehicle, of his choice, next year (no arguments there and he's pretty excited about it). LOL Woooooooo weeeeee. So far while he's been gone: master bathroom turned into an indoor pool (hot water line under the sink came off in the middle of the night) and soaked through carpeting and the cement foundation which caused me to have to move furniture and tear out all the carpet padding underneath, dishwasher took a major dump and had to have that replaced, truck tire was punctured by some "road hazard", Jake started talking back a lot more at school (that has finally been nipped in the butt), one of the bills under his name is wrong and I can't change it without him, me coming down with strep throat (really, haven't had that in at least a decade or more!), Jake and I both being sick, then there is general maintenance, doctor's appointments etc etc. I look back and wonder how I did it all before him? LOL Weird how easily I fell right into a routine with us, and I'll say this, it sucks having that gone right now. I miss him in more ways than one. :p

Ok so, I would like to state that I am not complaining about it all I am just saying how crazy it all was and has been/continues to be and what topped everything off with a tearful, pregnancy induced emotional breakdown. :p I am glad that since he can't be here he at least gives me a whole lot of emotional support and makes me crack up laughing with some of the things he sees and experiences. :) Yes it could always be worse! I am definitely looking forward to him coming home!!! Less than 50 days, YAY!!!

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